Hind sight

Hind sight its a wonderful thing. If i think back i wouldn't have allowed myself to feel anything. Last night when i looked out i saw no mother moon, and only a couple of stars, the cloud was such it blocked my view. Maybe that cloud cover was sent by you. So tell me who you really are, were you ever here solely or always thinking, of the next step in the game, to keep me drinking. Were you a person or just in my mind, you started out so very kind? If i see you as unreal then at least i can forgive, but if that person was not just my alter then i really do begin to falter. That's when it becomes quite scary, the risk i put upon myself, letting you into my home, my life, christ you wanted to become my wife. Questions unanswered and i know they wont be, you've cut your losses, and run away, maybe you'd still be here if thick nik had agreed to stay.